I’ve often advised my students that they will get  further by asking people rather than waiting for them to find you.

In most cases people are not looking for you.

When I was in high school, I asked my photography instructor if he would recommend me for the art school program I wanted to attend. He had done so for a number of my friends. I remember wondering why he hadn’t asked me if I needed a recommendation. Later, when I did ask him, he seemed surprised. Although I had won national awards for my photographs, he thought I was going into business or marketing. He never thought to offer.

It pays to ask.

My family — especially my mom —  thinks I’m a bragger. I’ll admit there have been times over the years when I should have kept my mouth closed and not shared so much information. My reasoning for doing so is this: I if didn’t share my goals, desires, ambitions and accomplishments, who would?  If no one knows what I’m after, I’m alone in my quest.

Over the years I’ve learned the importance of balance. I’m not perfect. I like to share, but I also like to listen. I’d  like to hear about your accomplishments, too. Developing relationships with people and sharing is a  powerful way to move forward with goals and dreams.

I have a friend who is not keen on sharing much about herself. She doesn’t like to impose or boast. She doesn’t take risks with her work because often she does not feel worthy and fears rejection. This is especially true with her blog.

She has a great blog. But, she fears it might not measure up to many of the fine blogs she follows. I can tell you her fans would disagree.

Her subscriber base has been growing, although at a slow pace, over the last couple years. She wrote a quality post recently that she felt was worthy of a little extra traffic. With a little encouragement,  she contacted bloggers she has been networking with and asked if they would “stumble” (use the Internet content sharing service StumbleUpon) her latest post.

Within hours she had more traffic than she had ever seen — thousands upon thousands of visitors. Long quality visits with a low bounce rates.

She asked: How did all this happen?

If you don’t ask,  you will miss opportunities. You don’t have to brag. Listening is the best networking tool. But, all your listening will go to waste if you don’t ask for the new opportunities or ask for the sale.

Rosh